I decided to give up my apartment in NYC in order to go and do the Edinburgh Fringe festival, so I packed up all my stuff and moved to NJ to the house I grew up in and live (temporarily) with my Mom. Well the first little bit before I left for Scotland was pretty great, focused on my show, saved money on rent and put off thinking about the entire rest of my life because I was focused on Scotland. So I went to Scotland for the month- you can see prior posts to see how that went (it went well). I came back and am now starting week 2 of "you better figure your life out soon Vicki" , my internal monologue.
You see, I did not grow up in the house that was filled with the smell of cookies as I opened the front door after a long day at school. I grew up in the house that I plotted to escape since the age of 12 (when I got my first job and my first taste of money=freedom). So now being in my 30's and moving home for the first time since I left over a decade ago is well a sure fire ego out the window move. I am thankful and starting to save (sort of).
Besides the money thing, it is the "where do I want to live?" element. I moved to NYC three years ago and loved it, I skipped I felt like the Mary Tyler Moore Theme song played everywhere I went, I found me. But the last six months of living in NYC, I realized my money was vanishing my spirit was breaking and my heart well kind of on auto pilot. So, I started to look at my wish list and doing my one person show was on it so I wrote it and started to perform it, now starting to figure out perfecting it and finding a new home for myself.
My thoughts......Astoria, Brooklyn, LA......a farm in the middle of no where???? If I were completely honest I kind of know LA is next, I just would have to have the funds, confidence and fully healthy happy self to start over again. I think LA because in my head I make these rules that are based on no fact what so ever like- rule: I learn in NYC and do in LA, rule: when I am a fully happy and open , love will find me I don't have to look for it, rule: people who seem mean are really weak and people who are kind are super strong. So, LA may win, just have to stay in NJ for a few months to amass a fortune that will be enough for a one bedroom apartment and a little car (not too hard). Just waiting for another person from craigslist to show up and buy some more of my furniture----trying to get down to four boxes of belongings , no matter where I move to, do not want to rent another U-haul. xo