the second before gravy

I am making this entry slightly Thanksgiving themed because, well it is in 2 days and always like to be seasonal. Whether you cook or not you will get it....when you make gravy and mix in your flour or cornstarch and continue to stir and then doubt whether you added enough stuff to thicken it and wonder if your turkey and potatoes will be naked at the table and then all of a sudden it comes together, gravy and the doubt runs away and then the confidence comes back and you knew there would be gravy all along. That is my life right now, the second before gravy. It is weird the things that can happen during that second: a pair of pants that never fit every time I took them out of my draw start to zip up and fit (almost legal for human eyes), people are starting to find me a bout touring this show I did (only faceless people in emails from towns I don't know), but still it could work out, my debt is going down (and then just to spite my efforts they charge me an annual fee). It is that moment where it could go either way and I could give up on my dreams or start to forget what they are.......no I want GRAVY!!! Gravy for me is creative satisfaction, monetary reward, and the confidence to trust the first voice that pops in to my head (believe me there are several sometimes I wish I had one of those deli number things in my head.) Gravy-----I wish for gravy and right now the low fat kind, I said my pants almost fit. Thanks for reading, Happy Thanksgiving!
xo, Vicki